We Are Made for Connection: The Table- a place to taste and toast together

We are made for connection: To taste and toast the good together

Sometimes it’s not the absence of people, but the absence of being known that hurts most. To sit at the table together gives space for sincere story telling. There is a profound honor to having someone sit with you and allow for them to have space to know and to be known. Gathering together can take place in many ways and in different spaces but something otherworldly happens when you set the table to share a meal together.

“People tell stories not simply to give themselves something to do while they eat, but because stories are important parts of communion, fellowship, love, joy, and remembrance which make up the mystery of the meal.”
Wilimon, Sunday Dinner, 11

In our current way of being we run from place to place without margin for connection. Even lunches end up being working lunches and the mid day rest for a meal and a story is diminished over time. In a world crowded with performance and loneliness, invitation itself is healing. Extending the invitation tells someone, you don’t have to be alone here.Sociologists call this “relational safety.” This phrase is eluding to the experience of being unguarded in the presence of another. Research from the University of Chicago (2024) found that emotional well-being improves more from being welcomed than from simply being socially included. Belonging requires proximity but healing requires softness. This is the generous hospitality we have been cultivating this week. We are slowly shifting to the mindset that our homes are space where people can arrive as they are, not as they wish to appear.

You Must sit down, says Love, and taste my meat:
So I did sit and eat
George Herbert, “Love” (III)

When we practice hospitality as presence rather than production, we become stewards of rest for one another. The table becomes a place where grief and laughter can coexist. Conversation becomes prayer without needing a script. Healing becomes something we co-author with God. And just like the Bread of Life descended to meet us and prepare a table for us. We are invited to join him in inviting others into the ordinary moments of sharing bread, brewing tea, and listening without hurry. We are creating homes to be intimate spaces of restoration. They are not just where we are restored they also give others room to breathe again.

“If we really want to learn someone's story, sitting down at the table and breaking bread together is the best way to start…When we sit and eat together, we don't just pass food around; fellow diners also pass bits of themselves back and forth as well, exchanging tales as well as condiments."
Leonard Sweet
My favorite way to share food is in the form of dessert. You? Who am I kidding- i’ll take food in any form. Below I share with you my favorite shortbread. I love to share this shortbread with everyone all year long.
This shortbread brings with it nostalgic memories of travel to Spain, these alfajores are a great blend of sugar and spice. Chai tea has always been a favorite, and when paired with dulce de leche the buttery shortbread takes on new life. Enjoy making this shortbread and always make enough to share.

A recipe to share: Chai Tea Dulce de Leche Shortbread

Ingredients for the shortbread

2 cups of all-purpose flour*
1/4 tsp of sea salt
1/2 cup of powdered sugar
2 tea bags of Spiced Chai Tea
1 cup of salted butter (2 butter sticks) at room temperature
1 tsp of pure vanilla extract
2 sheets of parchment paper
1 cookie cutter*

Instructions for the dulce de leche*

Begin by gathering all the ingredients to your work space
Prepare the dulce de leche first. You will need to prepare it the night before or first thing in the morning.
Pour the condensed milk into the glass jar, leave a little space in the top of the jar. Seal the jar and place it in the crockpot, fill the crockpot with water just below the rim of the jar. Cook the jar of condensed milk on low for at least 8 hours. The clear glass jar makes it easy to see how much the milk has caramelized.
After 8 hours take the milk out of the crockpot and let it cool before using it. In the sealed jar the dulce de leche can last up to a week when refrigerated.

Instructions for the shortbread

Begin by gathering all the ingredients to your work space. Pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.
In a bowl combine the flour and salt.
Cut the open the tea bags and add them to the flour and salt mixture. Whisk until well combined.
In a mixer, cream the butter until you see little peaks (about 1 minute). Then add powdered sugar to the creamed butter and mix for about 2 minutes and then add the vanilla as you finish creaming the butter.
Lower the mixer speed to stir and slowly mix in the flour until the dough is mixed well and turns crumbly.
Put the dough between the two sheets of parchment paper and roll it out a bit thick. Put the flattened dough on a cookie sheet and place in the freezer for about 20 minutes.
Take the dough out the freezer and cut out the shortbread, because the shortbread is a bit frozen when baked it will retain its shape better.
Bake the shortbread for about 10-12 minutes. Let them cool on the cookie sheet to let them brown without getting over cooked.
After your shortbread has cooled spread dulce de leche thickly on a piece and then adding another on top to create a sandwich or alfajores as known in Spain and Latin America.
Sharing the alfajores with friends over tea or coffee makes them immensely satisfying.

Notas

*if pressed for time you can buy a jar of dulce de leche. I enjoy the one from Trader Joe’s .
*use your favorite cookie cutter, I prefer one with scalloped edges
*Gluten free all-purpose flour can be used but take care to cut the shortbread a bit thicker because they tend to break easier.

The Art of Gathering:How Shared Meals Create Belonging, Safety & Healing

We Are Made for Connection: The Table- a place to taste and toast together

We are made for connection: To taste and toast the good together

“People tell stories not simply to give themselves something to do while they eat, but because stories are important parts of communion, fellowship, love, joy, and remembrance which make up the mystery of the meal.”

You Must sit down, says Love, and taste my meat:

So I did sit and eat

“If we really want to learn someone's story, sitting down at the table and breaking bread together is the best way to start…When we sit and eat together, we don't just pass food around; fellow diners also pass bits of themselves back and forth as well, exchanging tales as well as condiments."